Last night Thomas calls me and says, “So, did you go to that movie?” I was VIP’d to a film at the Docfest. I said, “No, I decided to stay at home and be depressed tonight.” Which was true. For a million reasons, it’s been a roller coaster of a week for me. He said, “Oh that’s a really BAD idea. I’m at the World Horror Convention and you should come down here — Borderlands is running the green room party and there’s free booze.” Free booze! And hardcore horror nerds! In a flash I had on my black dress, stripey socks, platforms and purple lipstick and I was on my way.
It was… hardcore. And the gender ratio, well… let’s just say that as I did a circuit around the main convention hall I felt like veal. It was kind of like being in a horror movie, where the protagonist accidentally walks into the big vampire party and is all like, woops. Uh, nice fangs. You’re so pale.
How did I get in? Bizarrely, I just walked in, which is amazing since it was insanely expensive to attend and covered in security. It’s a weird phenomenon with me; I’ve often just walked into a lot of places without credentials. I called Thomas to come find me (quick!) and we went up to the party suite, where they had an apartment-style room with a huge outside deck overlooking downtown. I walked up to the bar and said, “I’d like a very strong drink, please. I like vodka and rum.” The cute goth boy behind the counter said, “Do you want it regular, strong, or stupid?” I was all set — and shortly after that, a cute goth girl slipped me a mickey. Things got blurry and fun. I was introduced to people who already knew who I was, which was weird, and someone even wanted to take a photo with me. I’m not used to this. Soon I found myself back at the bar asking the staff “So, when does the ass-licking start? Is there going to be any strip D&D or what?” Their reply was, “Uh, you don’t really want to see these people naked.” Good point.
I did luck into meeting hottie Christa Faust, who peeled up her clothing to let me take photos of her gorgeous tattoos. And — heehee — to my delight, I discovered that she just wrote the novelization treatment of Snakes On A Plane. That’s right — the book comes *after* the movie with this one. Now *that* is fucking cool.
Right when the pool was beckoning me to take my clothes off and slip in (I have impulse control issues around bodies of water), Thomas wanted to get back home to his gf; good thing, that. Instead I came home and slipped into my big sleepshirt that reads WE NEVER SLEEP: THE WAR AGAINST SLEEP — and promptly lost the war against sleep.
