This has been a long, horny weekend. Ever since ErosBlog enlightened me to the talk about someone actually possibly funding my fantasy about a three (or four) way with a male and female Real Doll, my mind has been absolutely in the gutter contemplating the possibilities. (Scroll down to the original 6/10 entry for my latest sex fantasy weirdness.) A big boy toy, all-silicone, all-man, and all-pliant. Glassy eyes, posable limbs, just begging for it. And a girl, too — a dense silicone sister to hump like an unblinking, horny little love monkey.
What could happen? You see, I’ve never had a threesome, which I know, sounds awfully amiss considering my sex-expertness, my proximity to just about every kind of sex toy and sex technology available, and the thoughtful, brazen, sometimes musical perverts I surround myself with. Just like my previous confession (I still haven’t been in a bona-fide strip club or had a lap dance), my real-life experiences make me feel kinda like a nervous little sex-toy-collecting bunny.
Watching John Leslie’s Voyeur 25 last Friday didn’t help matters one bit — the first scene was an out of control three-way with two sexy, squishy all-natural women and one very sweet (but dirty) man, and they tried all kinds of things I’d like to do with the dolls. There would be lots of lube, and toys, too — how else will I pillage silicone boy’s village and storm his shores? First, I’d have to draw a bath to warm up my new guests, and then I’d enjoy toweling them off, oh yeah, baby. Then I’d drag their heavy bodies to my bedroom, sort of like Igor heading to the lab. Maybe then I’d have my helpful assistant jump in… Oh, it’s just too much to think about, but I can tell you that the fantasy ends with everyone covered in gallons of I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter, wrapped in at least twenty feet of rope, a popped and squashed inflatable St. Bernard, four melted vibrators, a silicone male Real Doll wearing a mullet wig and with "BITCH" tattooed on his ass, a female Real Doll with a big permanent silicone smile, one set each of soiled cheerleader, cop and Hot Dog On A Stick uniforms, and several visits from real officers due to concerned neighbors about the noise.
Okay, back to the porn mine.
