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Note: this was a two-part series for my Open Source Sex Chron column that (I think) reads best together, in sequence. Here’s Rape of the Real Doll Part One, and here’s a snip from the rest — Rape of the Real Doll Part Two:
IDollators are seen by Swanson as “not being able to have romantic relationships or whatever — or that desire for companionship as well as to enact violent fantasy.” “Lars and The Real Girl” is already being called “Capra with creep factor” and a film “about a blow-up doll delusion.” So the assumption here is that anything feminine and sexually receptive (indistinguishable for many people) is just “asking for it” (i.e. rape and/or the enactment of non-consenting violent sexual fantasies). And that like those dated porn-viewer stereotypes of men in raincoats, male sexuality is never less than one degree away from delusion, powerlessness over self-control and violence.
Pretty much everyone gets that these dolls are being used for sex — even if the sex itself is treated lightly (if at all), as evidenced in a PG-13 rating for “Lars and the Real Girl.” In other cases, the actual act of sex with a lifelike doll is detailed in graphic and snarky humor, as with Grant Stoddard’s 2004 Nerve.com story “I Did It For Science: Sex Doll” (nerve.com/Regulars/ididitforscience/SexDoll). Here Stoddard peruses a few Web sites and basically has a one-night stand — OK, a maybe a 15-minute daytime quickie — with a RealDoll prototype. Throughout the piece, Stoddard’s fascination and arousal are liberally laced with his own profound discomfort (“Grabbing her hand, I shrieked. Karen’s skeleton was discernible through her flesh, just like a real person’s. Regaining my composure, I moved my hand between her legs.”). In his conclusion, he rates the experience well and brackets it within the context of sexual fantasy, though to him the main advantage seems to be a partner who won’t resent male selfishness, as in, a fantasy partner who’ll never say no.
No matter what, it’s difficult for media perception to escape labeling what’s going on with the dolls as some sort of female degradation. But ask the iDollators themselves, and you might get a different story. (…)
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