Image by I Just Can’t Get Enough in Edinburgh.
This week’s column was inspired by all the commentary and controversy here and on my Flickr stream about the straight/bi/gay/lesbian stereotype exercise and it came out pretty snarky and confrontational — in other words, I love it. I’ve gotten some great feedback on it, too. I thought it might get me in trouble at the Chron because I take a swipe at them for oh-so–obviously never inviting me to their parties, but like, am I missing out anyway…? Anyway. Here’s a snip from Bye Bye Bisexual – Violet Blue Does bisexual fakery ruin it for the rest of us?:
After all the recent (and upcoming) hype about “bromance,” the “Sex and the City” negativity about people who “should just pick a side,” and recurrent media trendiness portraying bisexuality for its shock value, I want to post flyers all over San Francisco.
They’d read:
“MISSING: INVISIBLE BISEXUAL.
If not seen, please call (415) 814 9229”
A couple years back at the gay porn awards at the Castro Theater, I wrote here about being hit on by a straight-identified, so-called “gay for pay” porn performer. And I say “so-called” because that is how he calls himself, not because I’m trying to say anything else about a dude who groped me in front of 300 gay men — not out of attraction, but seemingly to prove a point to his male coworkers — that he was indeed straight and gay only for pay, and not bisexual. It wasn’t hot, it felt like bi-phobia and by extension, homophobia. The question is, when is bisexuality an agenda, and when is it a valid sexual orientation?
Personally, I blame the gays. No. I take that back. I blame the straight community, wherever they are — oh, right, they’re all around us like “Invasion of the Body Snatchers.” Except now I think I hear Kinsey yelling at me from the cryogenics lab in my basement unintentionally defrosting in the current heat wave. The thing is, most people don’t think that bisexuals actually exist. But Kinsey made this neat scale, because he was a nerd, and yeah you might be a straight-as-a-stick “1” (whether or not you like sports or receiving anal sex) or a flaming, Perez-Hilton Kinsey “6” (also whether or not you like sports or receiving anal sex) but most of us bitches (and I mean you) reside somewhere in the middle.
So in all seriousness, I blame Kinsey for making us all a bunch of almost-homos. Because when you look at the stereotypes that came up in this sex ed branding session, you see that when it comes down to it (and Jesus Christ I hope someone’s coming from it) bi men and women are treated with equal disdain by pretty much everyone. But what Kinsey proved through scientific method and data is that bisexuality isn’t just valid, it’s normal.
But what was most interesting to me was that after the gay-for-pay column went live, conversations in comments and on other blogs exploded about whether the gay-for-pay porn stars were indeed straight (as they identify) or bisexual, if not by proxy of practice. People got really, really upset about the issue. I got a mean and nasty letter from a somewhat homophobic gay-for-pay porn performer, who may have in fact had a “semi” when he hit “send.” Please email me again, douchebag. I do not have enough comedy in my inbox. (…read more, sfgate.com)
